Wedding Registry FAQs

What do I need to include in my wedding registry?

Although this varies from person to person, depending on your specific needs, personality, and taste, it’s always a good idea to include practical items. The choices should be made by you and your fiancé, but bear in mind that you're asking your friends and loved ones to buy them; it’s good etiquette to ask for helpful rather than luxurious or expensive items. Have a range of items to suit a range of budgets – your parents may want to spend more than your friend who has three kids. However, there are so many unique and unusual wedding registry ideas available these days that there are no limits. So whatever you need, whether you have a baby on the way, you need DIY tools to fix up your home or you’re trying to convert your new home into an oasis of eco-friendliness, you can find a wedding registry that you and your guests can be happy with. Once you’ve chosen your type of wedding registry you can collate a list of exactly you need for your particular project, then select your items based upon this list.

Do I have to have a wedding registry?

You don't, but they were created for a good reason. It was first implemented in Chicago during 1924, and couples across the world have been using it ever since. It ensures that you don't receive three gravy boats - which can occur if the registry is badly organised - and it's a lot easier than organising it yourself. If you do decide to have a wedding registry, beware of the terms and conditions! As you would with your dress, look at the fine details and confirm you're happy before paying out. Shop around, as wedding registries are big business and you can find some excellent businesses to use. If you're still not keen on having a wedding registry but are receiving presents, choose someone you trust to coordinate and organise with the guests both before and during the wedding.

Are there any unconventional wedding registries available? Since registries were first created they have become increasingly inventive. We're all used to the electric scanners in shops by now, but now honeymoon, charity and even gift card registries are all available too. A gift card registry is fantastic as it is stress and hassle free, and requires very little space or extra carrying on the day of the wedding. It also means you can buy whatever you need and want. Meanwhile, a honeymoon registry allows guests to donate money towards their holiday; it's often organised so a guest can pay for the equivalent of an evening meal or a sightseeing trip. This is great for those who have been living together and don't require the basics of moving into a new home. For the bride with everything, charity registries are a wonderful way to go. Guests can donate towards a charity of the couple's choice and the sum total will often be revealed at the celebrations. If you're still looking for a unique registry, look online for inspiration and reputable registry companies. One website even allows you to include eBay and etsy items on your registry, guaranteeing you receive exactly what you want and need.

Can I create my own registry? Asking someone else to carry out the responsibilities of a wedding registry is always best. However, you should always choose the items on the registry with your husband-to-be. There are countless ways to do this, depending on your choice of wedding registry. It's even possible to buy your own electric scanners to create a very specific wedding list, though it’s much better to use one of the many mobile apps that can scan items and add them to your list. Carefully pick each item: be sure that you like it, hopefully it will be practical and ensure that it’s good quality- the last thing you want is a wedding gift that you’ve dreamed about falling apart as soon as you take it out of the box. This is one advantage of seeing the products in person, rather than reading a description online, but the choice is yours. Bear in mind that in the months before your wedding your time is precious; outsourcing your registry can be a great time-saver. This answer seems to me as though you’re recommending creating your own registry! If not, then you need to include a description of the responsibilities undertaken by the person creating the registry, and when this transference of responsibility occurs.

Do I need to be in charge of the gifts on the day of the wedding too? On the day of the wedding you want to have the time and freedom to enjoy your day. You don’t want to be worrying about where you put the gift table, or how you’re going to get the large boxes and packages home. Give someone whom you trust else this job, and once you’ve picked out your list you shouldn’t worry about them until the day you open them. Are there any tools available to help me with my registry? For those opting for a traditional wedding registry, there are online programs which recreate your home and the guests can literally select which items they’d like to purchase from you. They disappear from the virtual house, ensuring you don’t receive any gift twice. There are also many original ideas for registries which can be managed wholly online. This is recommended as it makes the job much easier for you and your guests. If you choose a fund registry, this is the simplest of all as guests can quickly and easily transfer money through Paypal, by cheque, bank transferral (or numerous other methods) directly to your fund. Mobile apps have been created so couples can personalise their own wedding registry, allowing brides and grooms to record the shop’s location as well as the individual item. This makes it much simpler for guests and prevents confusion. It also means you aren’t limited to one shop, but you can include anything with a barcode! Shop assistants on the high street are still a great option as they can advise you personally. It’d be great if you could include specific programs/ app names please!

How should I inform my guests about my wedding registry? It depends on the registry. If you’ve opted for a physical store you could create a physical list, but if you’ve chosen an online registry this can still be an option. In any case, the store should have both versions of the registry list available for both their reference and your release. You should send emails and links to mobile apps to those guests who are good with technology, but remember that those of an older persuasion may have trouble with such technology, if they have access to it at all. However, you and their friends can always help them out with the websites if the registry is online. Does the Returns Policy really matter for the items I’m including in my wedding registry? Unfortunately, the same policies generally apply to wedding registries as they do to normal purchases. That’s not to say, however, that they’re not at all flexible. If you’re making your own registry comprised of items from various stores, do check their returns policy in case something goes wrong. However, if you’re going for a traditional wedding registry you need to make sure that you are happy with the returns policy. You don’t want someone’s expensive gift to you to be wasted because the company won’t return the item. If the items has a misleading item description, is defective or broken, you can demand a refund. At the very least, you should receive either store credit or a replacement item as compensation. If the company doesn’t clarify this in the terms and conditions, steer clear.

Am I limited to one store for my wedding registry? You can choose to use just one company for your wedding registry, but it’s much better idea to list numerous companies for your registry. This allows you to incorporate the best of all worlds and enable your guests to contribute, irrespective of their budget. By doing so you can include gifts for your favourite charity, towards a fund for your honeymoon or home, physical items that are domestic, practical or fun, as well as gift cards and even your wedding entertainment. You can organise this mixture of companies and gifts through your wedding website, if you have opted to have one, or by installing a wedding registry app for your tablet or smartphone.

How do I tell my guests about the wedding registry? I don’t want to seem rude by asking them for gifts! People disagree on the best way to do this, due to generational and cultural differences. Many older people may be offended if you enclose your gift registry information with the wedding invitation, so it is advisable to avoid this. Some believe it is acceptable to include gift registry information with the bridal shower invitation. This is because it is both appropriate timing and appropriate etiquette, as your guests will be buying gifts for the bridal shower anyway. You could simply ensure you have a conversation with each of your guests (or enough of them to ensure they tell every other guest) but it’s easy for someone to be missed out with this method.

The internet is fantastic as it provides a number of discreet ways to inform your guests about your registry. If you are using a company (or a number of companies) online, they may include a service that allows you to email all of your guests at once. If you’re creating your own registry you could cheaply create your own wedding website, which provides news and updates to all of the guests. This would allow you to include physical items, such as dining sets, as well as virtual items such as gift cards, in the registry. Or if creating and maintaining a website isn’t for you, you can easily use facebook, twitter and other social media to tell your guests everything you need. If you plan a timeline of when you’ll release each big piece of news (the wedding registry details, the bridal shower, requests for help and of course the date of the big day) before you begin, you can inform your guests at the right time. See the question below for more information on timing this.

When is the best time to tactfully tell my guests about my wedding registry, and how do I do so?

This is a difficult one. It’s commonly advised not to include such details with wedding invitations as this can seem rude – yet wait too long and you might leave it too late, which can also be rude and problematic in its own way. There’s no structured system to base your plans on. However, it seems that it is acceptable to include such details with the bridal shower invitation, as gifts are also purchased for this event. These invitations are usually sent one month before the shower itself, whilst the shower is usually held around two months before the wedding. This is an ideal time to inform your guests. As for how to tell your guests, modern technology is a convenient method. Companies online are ideal because you can simply email your guests with your items; you may even be able to use tools on the website to automatically send out your emails on your chosen date. Creating your own wedding website which lists your gift registry companies, using social media such as facebook and twitter and the classic method – by word of mouth, beginning with your loved ones - are all polite ways to inform your guests.

After the wedding, are thank you notes for the gifts essential?

This is essential, as your guests have not only taken the time to attend your wedding – some guests may have travelled from abroad – but they’ve taken the time and effort beforehand to carefully select and purchase an ideal gift for you. Whether you’ve used a registry or even if you’ve not asked for any gifts at all, you will receive gifts and your guests need to know that this is appreciated. You can even prepare your thank you notes at the same time as your invitations. In this way, you can guarantee you have one of everything for each guest – just make sure you store them somewhere safe and memorable! This guarantees no-one is forgotten, as people have been known to be extremely offended by not receiving a thank you.

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